Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Argh

Feel like I'm spending my youth away. I don't like this one bit. I need to really find my purpose and concentrate. How do people even do that in life? How do people end up successful? Do they really like what they do? What about people who are only mediocre at things they like? I know, I know, if you like it, you will keep doing/practicing it, but isn't there a limit in that? Passion can only bring you to a certain point, no?


But for now, home. I might have failed a subject, but I really CBF anymore.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Furry Walls

They don't bring you down.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Shed a Tear.

Best. Parody. Ever.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Can you hear my call? Are you coming to get me now?

Microblogging is taking over blogging, I suppose. Twitter and Tumbler works so much more efficiently. Sometimes I blog for the sake of blogging. I don't really know how to express how I feel via words.


Oh Blogspot, what should I do with you.

Guess I'll just post some songs that I've been listening alot to lately.








Saturday, October 30, 2010

Smile, it shows how strong you really are.

Almost November already.


The last time I blogged it was my birthday.

Much shit has happened since then.

Grandmother passed away :(. Ironic that in my last post I mentioned no one relatively close to me has left me.

Was a horrible feeling. I thought I was okay when I first heard the news, took a flight back home the next day. I thought I would be strong, that I would take it like a man.

But upon reaching home, I broke down seeing all my relatives mourning and crying. I didn't imagine it to be this hard. I couldn't exactly bring myself to the coffin where my grandmother was laid.

But that was 2 months ago. I am in a much better shape compared to then. Am already back in Melbourne, and life just goes on. And Melbourne's weather isn't exactly helping. Sometimes a little too hot, sometimes too cold, sometimes its pouring like a bitch.

Now, am looking forward to going home at the end of November.

I need a new start.

RIP, Madam Tee Siew Poi, beloved grandmother.

Tuesday, August 03, 2010

21, but the world keeps on spinning.

I am officially 21.

I still don't know what am I suppose to do with my life.

I tried looking forward, to see my future, I squinted, yet everything is vague and fuzzy.

And then I get greeted by terrible news on my birthday itself.

Khai Jake's brother, Khai Ron, who is also Su Lynn's and Khai Ric's cousin, passed away in a car accident.

I'm not sure if I met him before, or maybe I did in a club but I was intoxicated so I couldn't remember (because I met Jake in a club when he was celebrating Khai Ron's graduation), but I can't help but lie on my bed, motionless, thinking that someone very close to my friends, that a family member of my friends just passed away.

He was so young, just graduated, about to embark on a new chapter of his life, and had so much to do, but life just didn't turn out the way it was supposed to be.

1st of August 2010 was a cold, wet and gloomy day in Melbourne.

The worst thing was, how am I going to celebrate my birthdays in years to come without thinking that, for all of Khai Ron's family and friends, this will be a sad day as they will be mourning the lost of their beloved family member / friend. I had this indescribable guilt within me the whole day.

And then I thought to myself, what if I passed away before my time has come? Before I manage to do anything significant in this world? Before I manage to put an impact into somebody's life?

Also, this might not sound serious, but it is really sad to see posts on a deceased person's Facebook wall. I have seen so many touching posts on a deceased wall before like:

"Hi, it's been a year since you left, I hope you are well! I really miss you!"
And that really breaks my heart. I am somewhat thankful that his profile is private, and I am not his FB friend, because I cannot bear to see all of these.

Life is too short and unpredictable, how many times has this been said? That is why I need everyone to know:

I Love You

To my friends, family, everyone I have ever met in my life, you have all affected my life in one way or another, and I might have been a sarcastic bitch/bastard to many of you, or I might have disappointed you, but I love you. Thank you all for being there for me throughout my life.

I am thankful and fortunate that up to now, I haven't lost any one really close to me.

I know I have mentioned this before in one of my previous post, but yeah..

So to end this really depressing post which has caused unexpected tears to roll down my cheeks:

Leong Khai Ron, I may never have known you in my life, but I hope you are now resting in peace wherever you are. Wish I had known you =(.

And to all his family, I am terribly sorry for your loss, deepest condolences.

Sunday, May 02, 2010

Refreshed!

I am puke-free since January 2008 no more!

Last Friday on the 30th of April 2010 I became a vomit breathing dragon T_T

Sadded.

Didn't even intend to get drunk =(.

There was no event going on and me and a couple of guys got into the club thru an empty guestlist line! So loser-ish

But yea I remembered at least 2 151 bombs, 2 abcs, whiskey coke, cowboy shots, and a truckload of champagne (shit doesn't seem like it's alot).

GG!

Not to mention the week before that we drank 4 nights in a row during Anzac weekend.

I think I need a new liver for my birthday this year

Monday, March 22, 2010

Academy Award Winning Movie Trailer

How every academy award winning movie's trailer seem to be! =D

Friday, February 26, 2010

Up and over in down under.

So I'm now back in Melbourne.

The feeling is almost nostalgic, but I don't think I actually miss Melbourne that much.

But it is good to be back.

For 7 hours.

Because I flew over to Sydney that afternoon for 3 days.

Heh.

And now I'm back, and very afraid of airplanes.

Sydney was pretty fun!

Will prolly upload some pictures next post.

Till then!

Sunday, January 31, 2010

The Last Lecture

A friend of mine posted a link to a video on Facebook.

It was entitled "The Last Lecture Before His Death" or something. I thought that it was a video of someone giving a lecture right before he dies in the middle of the lecture hall.

Intrigued, I watched the 10-minute video.

Fast forward 10 minutes later and I achieved several epiphanies.

I was thinking in a different perspective.

What was so interesting and mind blowing about that video?

The lecturer in the video is Professor Randy Pausch. I'm no homo but I must say he had pretty good looks. He was brimming with energy and confidence.

Then he started telling his story. Turns out he has been diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer, and has only 6 months of good health left.

But he was so happy and cheerful! He looked so healthy! He even did several pushups on the stage!

I thought to myself, how can someone, knowing that his days are limited to 6 months, be so full of himself and so optimistic?

He talked about achieving his childhood dreams.

He talked about how his parents enabled him to achieve his dreams.

He talked about how his football coach gave him a lesson in life he would bring to his grave.

He talked about everyone who inspired him.'

Everything he said he was giving me a new perspective in life.


So after that video I managed to download his book, "The Last Lecture"

It covers very important life lessons, things that I usually overlook, the essence of time, achieving dreams, adventures, etc.

It was also his autobiography, starting from how he was such a nerd when he was a kid, to how he got his doctorate and finally how he managed to marry the woman of his dreams and have three amazing children.

It also tells us how he tries to battle the cancer, how he run into metaphorical brick walls in his life, how he used to be an obnoxious, arrogant young adult, and how he handled these problems.

It tells us how we should enjoy our life to the fullest even though we know our days are numbered.

But most of all, it was a way to communicate with his children and wife. His children were too young to understand what he wants to teach them and what he wants them to do with their life. It was a way to show how much he loved them and cared about them. He wants them to know of what he has accomplished in his life, because children always needs reassurance that their parents did great things.

Dr Randy Pausch passed away in July 2008. He contributed much to computer science and virtual reality. He was also one of the forefathers of Alice, a software that teaches programming to children. He used to work as an Imagineer in Disney World. He was a superb lecturer and an even better family man.

God bless his family.



And I strongly suggest you watch the "The Last Lecture" videos and maybe even read the book.

As I am doing a degree in digital arts, I deeply appreciate his contributions to the Virtual Reality, Building Virtual Worlds, Disney World and in programming. I wish I could meet him.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

If it wasn't for electricity, we'll be watching tv by candlelight.

Big Bang Theory

Dexter

Glee

True Blood

Those were my friends for the past 2 months.

Stop being unproductive, omg.

Fuck.

I think I really.

Need.

Someone.

New.

In.

My.

Life.

2009 was dull and boring. I had no directions, lost in my thoughts most of the time.

I keep myself in my apartment.

While most of those closest to me get into relationships.

It's sickening.

I hate being a lamp post.

I hate love movies.

They make it seem as though it's so easy to fall in love.

I mean, how on earth does : "I looked into her eyes and thought "She's the one"" happen so easily?

There are billions of women out there and "She's the one"? Thats 1/Billions.

There are plenty of fish out there in the sea and I'm probably in a run-down sampan using a twig as a fishing rod with a piece of stone as bait.

Friday, January 08, 2010

I think.

It's times like this that you feel like you're some sort of creature.

I just got owned, by food. Food poisoned me. Maybe it's how they avenge the other fellow food.

Liquidy substance just came gushing out both ends of my body.

I'm like a vomit breathing dragon!

And I just came to realise just how full of shit, literally, I am. Heh.

Oh, I watched Sherlock Holmes.

It was pretty good though I wasn't feeling too well.

Mostly thanks to the cast actually, the storyline was pretty linear.

Til next time.

Sunday, January 03, 2010

2010

A stream of glowing light shot up from the ground and illuminated the sky in a most fancy manner, accompanied by noise which very much sounds like a wheeze.

A loud booming sound was then heard and that stream erupted into many streaks of multicoloured lights, diverging from the core into every direction.

The sight was mesmerizing. Everyone looked up in awe as more fireworks painted the dark midnight sky with distinct bright colours.

Moments ago, thousands of people were just shouting out numbers in an orderly but reversed manner, starting from a "10".

And then it hit me. 'Tis already a new year, the year 2010. This is the year I hit 21 years of age, the year I legally become an adult, the year my mind supposedly "matures completely". I tried to recall how new years felt like being a non-adult, but it pretty much feels the same, maybe just a change in location and company. And the presence of alcohol. The fireworks were still as glorious as they were 10 years ago.

So am I supposed to live this year and every year onwards differently? Are there going to be major changes in my life? What does this year hold for me? Who knows? I might just die this year. Touch wood. One would never know. Life is unpredictable that way. Should we work super hard just to suddenly die whilst we are about to achieve it? Or should we do nothing with our lives because we know that we can just die anytime?

Humans should have this grace period for the first 50 years of our lives where we don't die. If we were to die young it should've been made that we die when we were just ovums or sperms, not live 18 years of our lives and then poof. It is completely illogical. If there exists a higher being who created us, why would he see his creation die before they get to do anything substantial in their lives?

And that is why I decided not to have new year's resolutions. Of course, it is also because I never fulfill them anyway so it defeats the purpose of having resolutions. I want to lead a spontaneous life. I want to live at the moment. I don't want to make myself miserable to achieve something that last for maybe a year or two and then the world ends and humans go extinct or some crap like that. I want to live however I feel like, not living up to expectations. Or maybe because I'm lazy. But that's besides the point.

Life is complicated as it is already. We should just enjoy it while we can and accept death because ultimately it is inevitable.

Happy New Year