THE SECRET TO SUCCESS!

I finally found out the secret to be successful in blogging! I was bumming around Uncle Ro's and NikQuah's and even Koala's blog when it suddenly hit me, an epiphany! My eyes saw hope, my spirits up high, my spear natured endowed me with soaring! Oops.

You see. The secret is to KISS. Keep It Simple Stupid. I took all 3 blogs and made a comparison between them, finding out what attract the readers to their own specific blog. I compiled it all.

Presenting, the uber list of "How To Attract Readers To Your Blog!":

1) Good English, preferably without !@#$%^ and random capitalisation

Okay, this is obviously the most important prerequisite if you want your blog to be anticipated by readers. Good English will give a good impression to any first-comers to your blog, further attracting them to read.

Example 1
Wa. TodAe hOr i iSh beRi haPpIi WoRx. My BaObEi sHe So yUk Ma <3 <3 <3~~ We mUaX mUAx In De CineMa LeHx! NoW i So hiGh i BcUm SoHai LiaOz~~!! ThEn Hor, GoT TiS UNclE dAM HiAo NeXt 2 My BaObEi leHz! He keEp kap My baoBei dE BooBies! Tamade! He no Die b4 aH? CCB La HiM! kNn I wAn DiaU HiM LiAoZx... SiBeh aNnOy Me....

Example 2
The stars were never brighter! It was a night to remember. I felt as if I was soaring in the skies! We were in the cinema, watching a romance movie. The and I can feel the chemistry between us. We made out. Our lips met, our tongues tangled themselves around each other. Shortly after, we were already breathless, wanting for more. Until I found this middle aged pervert next to her staring deep into her valleys of happiness. I was already imagining his bruised face.......

See the difference? I'll choose Example 2 any day, man! I would probably read Example 1's blog for a day, then forget it, like how I forget Specialist Maths formulae.


2) Either blog about something funny, something political, something interesting you can present with loads of visual aid, the latest hype, or don't blog at all.

Enough said. All summarised in 1 sentence. Remember, we don't really care about when you bathed your dog or how much gold you farmed within the 1st 10 levels of a DotA match (Oh by the way my personal best is 2 Wraith Bands, 1 Boot and an Eaglehorn and 4 Ancient Tangos within 10 levels.). Also, be sarcastic and play around with words. Blogging about stuff in the news and giving your comments and thoughts about it is also great.


3) Point form, or number form, like what I'm currently doing.

This is for viewing ease. For every new point or number, we give the reader an impression that it is the start of a totally different topic. Helps readers loads.


4) Keep blog updated.

Update at least once a week. If you go missing in action for too long, your readers will slowly diverge away. Also, quality over quantity. I just realised all my "Updating just for the sake of updating" blog posts never made it. Haha. 1 good post a week is better than 7 good-for-nothing posts a week.


5) If possible, try changing your blog layout once in a while.

We all like to see things changing, not static. Kenny Sia is a good example in this. Although very minor changes, they are noticeable and give readers the impression that we are working on the blog. Kenny changes his layout a few times throughout the year. There will be a different layout for each special festival in Malaysia (Chinese New Year, Christmas, Halloween etc).

6) A good introduction, body and conclusion.

Every blog post is like an essay. We have to show our efforts in every aspect of it. We must have a strong build up to what we intend to blog about, give a rocketing climax, and then end your post with a subtle end or a good/funny one-liner.


7) If you are a pretty/hot girl, forget all those on top, just keep posting up to date pictures of you in the dressing room or whatever!

Best served with provocative clothes (Suggestion: birthday suit) that will make guys go "Agaga" over it. Some might right click and save the picture though (Hi Shen Jin!), beware!

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Anymore you can point out? Tell me. Leave a comment. Please?

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